I haven't done anything other than go to work, come home, walk Tammie and then either sit and knit or moan and curse to myself. I am a sufferer of depression and I have good days and bad days and lately it's more bad days than good. The only good thing at the end of the quiet, lonely week is seeing my partner and spending precious time with him.
During the weeks that have passed since I last blogged, I have been knitting a fair bit and made a couple of pairs of these cute little socks that are a free pattern on ravelry.
I have another 2 pairs to knit before Good Friday. I did intend to knit them this weekend but when I got to Frank's I had left my Regia sock yarn at home which made me curse in my head. I couldn't bare not having any knitting to do so Frank popped to Wilkinson's and got me some striping yarn. At least I could knit and ended up designing a cushion cover.
Frank treated me to a load of My First Regia Sock Yarn a while ago and I have started making a mitred square blanket which I call 'My Worries Blanket'. It's a long term project because I think my main worries are going to be a long time going so I use all the bright colours and try to think of all the good times. I have done 15 squares already.
I can see I am going to have a problem with Tipsy whilst I work on my blanket. I have got into a routine with my knitting just to keep focused. In the mornings before work, I knit on some baby socks, then at work I do the same at lunch break. I get home and when I settle down after a little tidying, I knit on either the mitre blanket or my crochet project. It kind of keeps me sane in some way and I know for a fact that I am going to have to try and keep busy now that the nights are going to be lighter. I would not like to admit how many times I say to myself each day that when I get home I am going to clean the windows or tidy up in the garden. It's quite difficult when you've lost interest in the home you have lived in for over 20 years.
I have just got back from being with Frank and I find it really hard each time leaving him and walking back into this house. I take my coat off and try to make an effort to stay positive so I clean! I hate cleaning when I know it's only gonna get dirty again. I spend about an hour doing housework and then get ready for bed and watch tv or podcasts. I also think a lot about baking again but when I am here I can't be bothered or don't enjoy it but I must make an effort because money is very tight and I am trying to come up with ideas to make a few dinners that can last a couple of days. I am going to try and do a veg curry so that it will last two days. I did bake some butterfly cakes yesterday and I enjoyed doing them because I knew the people around me were appreciating the effort. I think they went down well!
Oh well, I am going to say bye for now and hope to post an update by the end of the week, can't promise but will try. I will leave you with a photo of the heron I saw at the park the other morning, just standing there bold as brass like he owns the place. Rather cute too........have a good week everyone.